APPLICATION FOR PERMISSION TO DATE MY DAUGHTER

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APPLICATION FOR PERMISSION TO DATE MY

DAUGHTER

NAME___________________________________________________________

DATE OF BIRTH___________________________________________________

HEIGHT____________ WEIGHT________ I.Q.________G.P.A. ____________

SOCIAL SECURITY NUMBER____________________ ___________________

DRIVER'S LICENSE NUMBER _______________________________________

BOY SCOUT RANK ________________________________________________

HOME ADDRESS _________________________________________________

CITY ____________________________________________________________

STATE ___________________________

1. Do you have one MALE and one FEMALE parent? __________

2. If NO, explain _________________________________________________________________

3. Number of years parents married _____________

4. Do you own a VAN______ Truck with oversized tires _______ Waterbed______

5. Do you have an Earring ______ nose ring ______ belly button ring _______

engagement ring ________ __________

6. In 50 words or less, what does LATE mean to you? ________________________

_________________________________________________________________

_________________________________________________________________

7. In 50 words or less, what does DON'T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER mean to you?

_________________________________________________________________

_________________________________________________________________

8. In 50 words or less, what does ABSTINENCE mean to you? _________________________________________________________________

_________________________________________________________________

_________________________________________________________________

9. Church/Synagogue you attend __________________________________________________

10. How often? ________________________________________________________________

11. When would be the best time to interview your parents? ___________________________

12. Your Minister/Priest/ Rabbi __________________________________________________

Please answer the following. All questions will be kept confidential unless I feel you are a threat to my daughter, in which case a full page ad will be taken out in the local newspaper.

13. If I were shot, the last place on my body I would want to be shot in is________________

14. A woman's place is in the _____________________________________________________

15. The one thing I wish this application does NOT ask is _____________________________

16. When I first meet a girl, the thing I notice FIRST about her is ______________________ (if the answer to this question starts with a B, leaving the premises, keeping your head low and running in a serpentine matter is advised.)

17. What do you want to be IF you grow up? _______________________________________

I swear that all answers supplied are true and correct to the best of my abilities, under penalty of death.

SIGNATURE _________________________________________________________________

Thank you for your interest in my daughter. Please allow 4 years for processing. You will be contacted in writing by either myself, via e-mail, or by summons, via sheriff deputy.